Sunday, August 19, 2012

BlogElul: Return


"Reurn again, return again, return to the land of your soul.
Return again, return again, return to the land of your soul.
Return to who you are, return to what you are, return to where you are. 
Born and reborn again.
Return again, return again, return to the land of your soul."
-Rabbi Shlomo Carlebach z"l 

I've heard this song several times in different contexts that are important to me, so whenever I hear it now I am instantly brought back to those places- BCI, High Holiday services at RTOS. I appreciate this song so much that I even have it in my iTunes. 

While I love the melody, the concept of "returning" is something that I find challenging. I often find it difficult to move on from the parts of my life that have been a struggle. I don't want to go back to who I was at a certain time in my life- I've worked hard to get to where I am now. 

I do, however, appreciate and value the idea of not losing oneself in the process of discovering who you are. I often feel lost on my Jewish journey. I sometimes just want someone to tell me exactly how to practice Judaism in a way that will be meaningful to me. When I think back to how I practiced Judaism just ten years ago, I am amazed by how much I have changed. What I find most remarkable is that regardless of how far I stray from my Reform Jewish upbringing, certain aspects of liberal Judaism still make me feel most connected Jewishly. 
So, my question still remains. Do we need to return? 



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